We tend to perceive endings as a kind of death. We dread them, we try to prevent them, and we grieve them, experiencing feelings of scarcity and loss. We think that’s actually OK, to an extent. We can mourn our losses, but it’s also important to see endings as a means to impending freshness.
We tend to get so caught up in endings that we forget to focus on the present moment. We cling to what has been (the past) and fear the unknown, post-ending (the future). This can be the ending of a job, a friendship, an experience, or of course, a love or relationship. Being OK with—and even excited about the prospect of—an ending is truly allowing ourselves to be present.
When it comes to love and the ending of relationships, we consulted confidence (and fitness) queen, Britteny Floyd-Mayo, the founder of Trap Yoga Bae, who knows all about how to stay flexible in life and in the mind.
When it comes to the end of a relationship, she imparts, “You need to stop ‘seeing the good’ in suckas and start seeing the shit they show you. Their energy will never change, but yours can.” We can’t think of a better amen moment, when that’s the kind of ending we’re hung up on.
Floyd-Mayo made sure to hone in on thinking about what’s next, rather than what could’ve been: “Your journey is difficult because you’re called to do dope shit, and not everyone will be allowed on the muthafuckin’ ride. Don’t trip; the universe has a way of gifting you something in return when you lose something close to you. That’s what moving forward is all about.” It’s about momentum. No need to swing backward when everything in our life is ahead of us.
Much of the time we don’t realize that something isn’t serving us. Maybe it looks great on paper. Maybe it’s the source of our livelihood, whether we are truly happy in it or not. In this way, we can keep ourselves stuck in energetic toxicity, and so we are feeling Floyd-Mayo’s enthusiasm when she saged us with this: “When you focus on your path, you’ll gain more than you ever fuckin’ lost.”
2021 is the year we match this kind of intensity. Sometimes we don’t choose when the eject button is hit, but that doesn’t make it a bad thing. Embrace the free fall, and get ready for new growth. All we can do is bloom.