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14 Personality Tests to Take With Your S.O.


Look, everyone is obsessed with personality tests (and for good reason). They’re similar to horoscopes and astrology, in that they not only give people something to believe in about themselves, but provide a glimpse of why others act the way they do, too. Kind of cool, right?

Personality tests and quizzes can be used solely for personal growth and ~learning~ more about why you function the way you do, but they can also be used in the dating game—you know, to see if you’re actually compatible with Mr. Doesn’t-Know-the-Difference-Between-Their and-There-but-Is Taller-Than-6’2″.

And if you’ve been around the block on dating apps, there’s a good chance you’ve seen people weird flexing their Enneagram type in their Tinder bios or mentioning their love language on first dates.

So whether you’re single, in a relationship, or boning your next door neighbor, it may be worth taking one of these 14 personality tests to learn more about how compatible you actually are—or, at the very least, what you should be looking for.


1. If you want something to flex

The Enneagram Personality Test

Okay, if you and your S.O. have the patience to spend longer than 15 minutes completing a questionnaire, the Enneagram personality test is about as in-depth as you can go. It divides you into one of nine “types” (or categories) with ultra-specific results tailored to you. Pro Tip: If you’re single, your “type” would be a good thing to add to your Tinder bio.



2. If you want to start with a classic


This beautifully designed Myers-Briggs test not only reveals your personality in detail, but will help you see how similar (or different) you and your partner are. It also helps that all the outcomes are put into four different groups, so you can humble brag if you both land in the same one.


3. If you’re dying to know how good you are together


Developed by literal NASA rocket scientist Rashied Amini, the free version of this quiz follows a similar structure to Myers-Briggs, but goes deeper into things like how you approach single life, what romantic relationship types work best for you, and even which locations statistically have the most compatible people for you (by taking into account your individual career and life goals). If you’re really ready for the truth, it can also tell you whether you should break up or not…


4. If you’d like to immediately improve your relationship

The 5 Love Languages

Based on the best-selling book by Gary Chapman, this quiz doooes require you to sign up, but trust, it is so worth opting into spammy emails. Knowing how you each prefer to receive and express love (instead of assuming everyone wants hugs or surprise gifts) makes things so much better in a relationship. Seriously, this should be asked on every first date to establish right from the start how you should expect to communicate with your partner.

5. If you really want to know them

FiveThirtyEight’s Personality Quiz

This test claims that most personality quizzes are “junk science” and its results are better (Lol, ouch to everyone else on this list), so let’s explain: FiveThirtyEight’s personality quiz ranks you on things like your openness to new experiences, emotions, agreeableness, and extroversion. All key factors in determining compatibility, no?



6. If you’re looking for a perfect bar date idea

36 Questions on the Way to Love

Ah yes, who could forget the iconic 2015 New York Times essay about a set of questions so vulnerable, yet so approachable, that it could potentially make falling in love happen faster? Regardless of whether you want to become life partners with the person sitting across from you at the dinner table, these Qs are a fascinating way to get to know someone that go above and beyond, “So, what do you like to do for fun?” and if that’s not worth doing this with your date, I don’t know what is.

7. If you want a quick tempe

rature check on your relationship

The Gottman Institute’s Relationship Quiz

John and Julie Gottman, PhDs, have been researching romantic relationships for more than 40 years. With all that experience, they claim that they can predict if a couple will break up or divorce with more than 90 percent accuracy (a weird flex I low-key wish I had, too). So if you want to check in on whether your relationship’s still in a good place, this quiz is a good place to start.

8. If you’re itching to get realer about your sex lives

We Should Try It!

If you’ve had things you’ve wanted to try in bed (or even just smaller preferences), this is a great way to talk about them without having a formal sex conversation with your S.O. Each person fills out the in-depth questionnaire and you only see the things you both agreed on. Judgement-free zone here, folks.


9. If you want to know each other’s kinks in a safe space

The XConfessions App

Similar to We Should Try It!, feminist adult-film director Erika Lust’s app is basically Tinder for sexual acts—although it specifically focuses more on kinks and fantasies. And again, you only see what you both swiped right on, which creates a safe place to discuss what you’re both interested in trying.



10. If you’re tired of all that reading

The VisualDNA “Who Am I?” Quiz

This one is fun because it’s all visual and especially easy to follow…but the results are super detailed and eerily accurate. Click on the images and answer choices that speak most to you and see where the quiz takes you.


11. If you want to truly geek out


You know how sometimes, with typical personality quizzes, you pick an answer you feel like you should pick rather than the one you actually want? Yeah, you can’t do that here. All these questions ask you to think of something vague (like a cube in a desert) and how you imagine it reveals who you truly are. Honestly, prepare to be shooketh by how real the results are.


12. If you’re planning a Friday night in

Our Moments

While using conversation starters with a romantic partner can, in theory, feel like you’re both in desperate need of things to talk about, these questions skip the small talk and dive right into topics even the closest couples maybe never broached before. At the very least, it beats rewatching Friends again, that’s for sure.


13. If you’re both addicted to astrology

The Pattern App

Whether your partner already knows their moon sign or is at least willing to ask their mom for their birth time, this app tells you everything you need to know about your astrological personalities (and how well they mesh together). Yeah, yeah, it’s not technically a quiz, but why not do a deep analysis on someone based on where they were born?


14. If you want to memorize each other’s birth charts

Co–Star App

If you want an even deeper analysis on your planetary alignments and *why* you clash when you do, check this app out. It takes astrology and horoscopes just a lil bit further that The Pattern App, if that’s your thing.


From Cosmopolitan

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